We have previously discussed several elements from the book “The Love Dare,” and began the exploration of incorporating these elements into daily routines. Here we will discuss the real-world application of these dares, their possible outcomes, and the deeper meanings behind them. The focus of this series is to provide you with the tools you need to improve marriage communication, by illustrating what it means to become actively involved in your marriage like never before.
“Love is not irritable.” This dare primarily encourages you to be slow to anger. Do not respond with frustration, but with love. In other words, if your spouse does something or says something that you would normally respond to in any negative way, respond with positivity instead. If you provide constructive words in place of anger, you may actually quell the issue instead of exacerbating it. You may also find that your partner is able to develop a new kind of respect for your feelings, too. Positivity begets positivity. Negativity begets negativity.a couple looking out at a sunset
“Love is not jealous.” This dare basically says to rid yourself of jealous thoughts. How do you do this? By remembering and appreciating why you once found yourself attracted to your partner. Even if you already are, remember the qualities that drew you to him/her in the beginning. Many couples have a habit of being drawn to each other for certain reasons, then despise those qualities during the relationship. This is largely because of fear. Be proud of those qualities in your spouse. Be your partner's biggest fan. Thank your spouse for these qualities. After all, they are why you chose him or her to begin with.
“Love Makes Good Impressions.” This dare is one of my favorites. It is simple, but can have a great and lasting outcome. Greet your partner with enthusiasm and love. Look into their eyes, smile widely and honestly, and be genuinely excited to see him or her. Do you remember what it was like in the beginning? Do you remember the butterflies in your stomach? Do you remember how you couldn't wait to be near this person? There is no greater demonstration of love than showing someone how valued they are. Show your spouse how much you appreciate them. When your spouse feels special, good things can happen. And if the feelings are reciprocated, things can go back to the way they were in the beginning.
“Love is Unconditional.” This dare asks that you demonstrate your love for your partner by going out of your way for them. Doing something just to show your appreciation for your spouse – an action that illustrates your commitment. Take on one of your spouse's chores, take him or her somewhere nice, or even get involved with something they really enjoy. Taking an active interest in your wife or husband's hobbies shows that you appreciate them in a deeper way than just saying ‘I love you.' It demonstrates that you notice and care about what they are interested in. It also gives you both a reason to do something together.
If you're reading this and you think your love is strong, but you have doubts if it'll be strong forever, give me a call.

Dan Exner, J.D.

Family Law Attorney

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