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You hear and read about how love conquers all; songs are sung about it, poems are written praising its virtues, and cards seem to say perfectly what you feel in your heart better than the words you try to find.  You believe that no matter what obstacles arise you can conquer them with love.

Why then, does the United States have the highest divorce rate in the world?  Half of all marriages end in divorce in this country.  What went wrong in these relationships, and what keeps couples still believing that they will beat the odds, and that theirs will be one of the marriages that actually “works”?  It’s all in the power of love, and love overcoming all doubts.

Couples should, although, before they make this big decision, sit down and talk -really talk – to each other.  Find out what will be major issues in the relationship and if they are something that can be resolved or compromised on.  What are your goals and what do you hope to accomplish in the relationship.  Do you both want children and how many, do you want to live in the country or city, are you both going to be wage earners?  Even issues on shared household chores such as cooking, cleaning and laundry could become major issues as the marriage continues and time passes.

Sharing common goals and interests, not just golfing, skiing, or dancing – but important issues, is extremely important.  It gives you a life challenge that you are working toward together as a team and is a great strengthening bond to keep your relationship grounded in realistic expectations.

There are going to be rough patches in any relationship, because you are two individuals with hopes and dreams of your own. But hopefully, most of them coincide on some level with your partner’s wishes. By keeping an open line of communication open between you, love just might conquer all.


Dan Exner, J.D.

Family Law Attorney

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